Putting yourself first is selfless.

“Investing in yourself is the best investment you can ever make.”

― Mohsin Jameel

“I became someone that was relied and depended on. I was a rock for the family. Balancing my energy for my job, my children’s needs, maintaining a relationship with my husband, and seeking friendships with women who understood this delicate balancing act.”

Sound familiar?

I can understand how hard it can be to put yourself first when you are a parent; but investing in your wellbeing is essential if you want to remain calm and in control and able to offer the stability that our children need. We are surrounded by "busy" people and it can be hard to allow ourselves to just Stop every once in a while. When my girls were young and my husband came home from work he would ask me what I had done that day and I would feel the need to justify my every minute with action. I remember a good friend told me that she would sit and watch a film some afternoons. I couldn't comprehend that at the time.

When our brains and bodies are at their wit's end, there is absolutely no way that we can be fully present for the people in our lives. It's often when they need us most that we suffer too. Their stresses become our problems and fill our buckets and we respond to problems in default ways; Worry, Anger or low mood.  (Have look at my blog on our Stress buckets.)

So you need take time out from the craziness to refuel, recharge and relax your brain. When you are relaxed you are in control. So Take 5 minutes, 30 minutes or even an hour when you can for you in the knowledge that your loved ones will benefit from you doing so too.

If you can make self-care a priority, you will see your capacity for the care of others grow exponentially.

People are often surprised by the number of conditions that are exacerbated by underlying anxieties or lack of sleep. Anxiety can manifest in many ways resulting in unhelpful physical and emotional symptoms. Lack of sleep can be responsible for us feeling grumpy, overwhelmed and unable to make decisions.  My inability to manage my stress eventually manifested in repeated panic attacks. They were not only scary for me, but for the girls too who witnessed them. Our children care about us and need to know that their "rocks' (us) are steady. When we crumble so do they because they feel unstable and vulnerable without our strength.

I think my passion for my work in helping families stems from my own experience many years ago, and the number of amazingly inspirational clients that I have had the fortune to work with over the years. Together we can stabilise and be able to offer the support that our families need whilst being able to enjoy ourselves in the process.

My downloads are designed with you in mind. Offering you a chance to “switch off” and regain control of your thoughts. Whether you are sleep deprived due to a new family arrival or stuck in a cycle of waking  in the night, these will help you through. Helping you to manage your stress and allowing you to function.

So here are 5 reasons why you should invest in yourself. It’s not selfish, its essential and selfless:

1. Energy:

When you push guilt aside and allow yourself to be in the moment of an activity that inspires and energises you, you take the positive flow of emotion back to your family. Them missing you for a few hours is worth it when they get a mum who is smiling, happier, and rejuvenated.

2. Focus:

Instead of spending your time with them feeling frustrated, short tempered, and day dreaming about a moment to yourself, you will be focused on them because you know you have that time scheduled for yourself. You can put your phone away when you play with them. The time with them may have less quantity but it will be more quality.

3. Excitement:

When is the last time you had a project you were so excited about it didn’t matter if you got less sleep because you craved time for it? You got so lost in the process you skipped a meal by mistake. This should be everyday not once in a awhile. That kind of excitement and passion should be a requirement for your life not a bonus. It is contagious and will help your children find activities that make them feel the same. I have to say that for many years I really struggled with this one. I used to function, not thrive.

4. Confidence: 

The more you grow as a person and master different skills, your confidence grows. You become more open to trying new things because you believe you can. When you overcome something you used to struggle with, it is empowering and inspires more action. Confidence comes from “doing” the thing that you fear.

5. Taking Action: 

We don’t always know what makes us happy. The best way to learn is by taking action and trying different things. If we want our children to explore the world and different ideas, we need to show them through action. When we involve our kids in the process of learning a new skill or visiting a new place, you will bond more as a family and get them comfortable with this priceless life skill.

In many instances we know what it is that we want to achieve but taking the first step can seem impossible. If you need a "hand to hold" to get you moving then ping me a message and together we can get you on your path.

You can do it!