Back to School: Could You Recognise the Early Signs of Eating Disorders in Children?
- holly7658
- 11 minutes ago
- 7 min read
Why September is a good time for parents and teachers to pay attention to changes in eating, mood and behaviour.
Early Signs of Eating Disorders in Children: What You Should Look For.
September has a particular energy don’t you think?.
New school year. New teachers. New classes. New friendships. New expectations.
For many children and young people, going back to school is exciting. For others, it can bring a significant amount of anxiety and pressure, especially for those entering exam years. And sometimes, in the middle of everything else that needs to be managed, eating is one of the first things to slip. It can be viewed as inconvenient for some and nerves too can get I the way. In this blog we will explore the Early Signs of Eating Disorders in Children and What Parents Should Look For.
Breakfast gets missed because they're running late.
Lunch is skipped because the queue is too long.
They don't eat because none of their friends are eating.
They don't like eating in front of other people.
They become increasingly concerned about what is in their lunch.
Or perhaps they simply say:
"I'm not hungry." A natural response for many who are anxious. Sometimes coupled with secrecy and binging.
Once in a while, this may be nothing more than a busy school day. I remember myself when I was younger frequently skipping breakfast when I was feeling worried about the day ahead.
But when changes in eating start appearing alongside changes in mood, behaviour, body image or social withdrawal, it is worth paying attention.
Because eating disorders are often easier to treat when they are recognised early. NICE recommends assessment and treatment at the earliest opportunity when an eating disorder is suspected. (Nice)
Going all day without eating isn't just about food
One of the reasons I feel strongly about parents understanding this is because food provides fuel for a developing brain as well as the rest of the body. As a parent of a recovering anorexic these were many of the things that I missed!
Adolescence is an important period of brain development, including development of systems involved in executive function, emotional regulation, reward and decision-making. Adequate nutrition is part of supporting this development. (PubMed)
When someone is eating too little, the effects aren't necessarily limited to feeling hungry. In fact, one of the first things that does change are the hunger cues are switched off so the person genuinely doesn't feel hungry even though they are in desperate need of food.
Research into starvation and malnutrition has found associations with cognitive difficulties, anxiety, depression, emotional regulation difficulties and social withdrawal. (PubMed)So, is it anxiety driving the relationship with food or the food causing the anxiety?
This can create a difficult cycle.
A young person feels stressed or anxious.
They eat less.
Their ability to concentrate, regulate emotions and cope with everyday demands can become more difficult.
They feel overwhelmed.
They withdraw.
And the behaviours around food can become increasingly entrenched.
This isn't about a child being difficult.
It isn't necessarily about attention-seeking.
And it certainly isn't simply about "choosing not to eat."
Eating disorders are complex mental health conditions, and restriction itself can become part of the illness. What many find hard to understand is that abstinence and obsessive thinking about food and body image are often the symptom of the eating disorder rather than the cause.
What might you notice?
There isn't one particular sign that tells you a child has an eating disorder. Trust your gut. If something feels “ off” then it probably is.
And importantly, you cannot determine whether someone has an eating disorder simply by looking at their body or weight.
NICE specifically advises against relying on a single measure such as BMI when assessing eating disorders. (Nice). I personally am not a fan of the BMI but in some cases it can be a useful indicator, and it is certainly something that the medical profession rely upon.
Instead, look for changes and patterns.
Changes around food
You might notice:
Frequently skipping breakfast
Regularly coming home with an untouched lunch
Avoiding school meals or eating around other people
Suddenly becoming very particular about food
Cutting out foods they previously enjoyed
Developing rigid rules about what, when, where or how they eat
Becoming distressed when plans around food change
Eating increasingly slowly or taking food apart
Avoiding family meals
Becoming uncomfortable around treats or celebrations
Increased interest in calories, ingredients, weight or "healthy" eating
Talking frequently about food, weight or body shape
Asking for reassurance about what they have eaten
Changes in behaviour
You may also see:
Increased secrecy
Withdrawing from family or friends
Avoiding social situations involving food
Increased exercise or exercising despite being tired or unwell
Exercising to "make up for" eating
Frequent trips to the bathroom after meals
Changes in clothing choices or suddenly wanting to cover their body
Increased body checking
Comparing their body with others
Increased perfectionism or rigidity
Difficulty concentrating
Becoming unusually preoccupied with routines or rules
Beat also highlights social withdrawal, avoiding eating with others, tiredness, difficulty concentrating, irritability, anxiety, rigid behaviour, perfectionism and changes in weight as signs that may be noticed in a school environment. (Beat)
And then there are the changes you might notice in them
Sometimes the first thing a parent notices isn't the food.
It's the child.
They're not quite themselves.
Perhaps your normally chatty child becomes quieter.
Your relaxed child becomes increasingly rigid.
Your easy-going teenager suddenly becomes incredibly anxious about plans.
They lose their temper over things that previously wouldn't have bothered them.
They stop joining in.
They retreat to their bedroom.
They seem exhausted.
They're struggling to concentrate.
They don't want to go out with friends.
They stop enjoying things they previously loved.
Or you simply have that feeling that something isn't quite right.
Listen to that feeling.
You don't need to wait until you have proof.
Why early intervention matters
Eating disorders can become increasingly difficult to challenge as behaviours and thinking patterns become established.
The brain is highly adaptable — and repeated behaviours can strengthen particular patterns of thinking and responding.
Research into eating disorders increasingly shows changes involving brain networks associated with cognitive flexibility, emotion regulation, reward processing and enteroception. (PubMed)
In restrictive eating disorders, inadequate nutrition can also affect cognition and brain development. This is particularly important during adolescence, when the brain is still developing. (PubMed Central (PMC))
This is one reason early support matters.
The earlier we recognise that something is changing, the earlier we can provide appropriate support.
What should you do if you're worried?
First of all, don't panic.
Don't turn every meal into a battle. It's often not about the food and if your child could eat they would.
Try to approach your child with curiosity rather than interrogation.
Instead of:
"Why aren't you eating?"
you might try:
"I've noticed things seem a little different around food lately. How are things feeling for you?"
Or:
"I've noticed you've seemed quite tired and withdrawn recently. Is there anything going on that you'd like to talk about?"
Create opportunities to talk without making the conversation solely about food or weight.
And if you are concerned that an eating disorder may be developing, seek professional advice rather than waiting to see if it gets worse.
Your GP can be an important starting point, and suspected eating disorders in children and young people should be referred for age-appropriate specialist assessment. (Nice)
A final thought for parents
One of the most important things I want parents to know is this:
You don't have to be certain that something is wrong before you ask for help.
You don't need to wait for significant weight loss.
You don't need to wait until your child admits they have a problem.
And you certainly don't need to wait until things become a crisis.
Sometimes the earliest signs are subtle.
A missed breakfast.
An untouched lunch.
A child who suddenly stops eating their favourite foods.
A teenager who no longer wants to join the family for dinner.
More anxiety.
More rigidity.
More withdrawal.
More anger.
More of a sense that your child just isn't quite themselves.
None of these things automatically mean an eating disorder.
But together, they may be telling you that your child is struggling and needs some attention and support.
And that is worth listening to.
Where I can help
My specialist area is the relationship between food, anxiety, emotions and behaviour.
As a Solution-Focused Hypnotherapist and Eating Disorder Coach, I work with people to understand the patterns that can develop around food, anxiety and coping, while focusing on the possibility of creating healthier and more flexible ways forward. I trained at the National Centre for Eating Disorders and hold their Master Practitioner Certification.
My method is collaborative and tailored to each individual client.
If an eating disorder is suspected or actively present, I prioritise appropriate medical and specialised eating disorder care, either as a primary approach or in conjunction with additional therapeutic support. I recognise the significance of nutrition and am trained to assist during the "re-feeding" stage of recovery.
Sometimes, however, what a young person and their family need is an additional safe space to understand what is happening and begin building the skills and confidence that support recovery.
If you've noticed changes in your child's eating, mood or behaviour this September and something doesn't feel quite right, please don't ignore that instinct.
Early conversations can matter.
Early support can matter.
And recovery is possible.
Contact me here
Why Solution Focused Hypnotherapy Works
As a Solution Focused Clinical Hypnotherapist, I don't spend months analysing everything that's gone wrong.
Instead, we help your brain become better at creating what's possible.
Through Solution Focused Hypnotherapy we work to:
reduce anxiety
regulate the nervous system
strengthen motivation
reduce emotional eating
calm food obsession
rebuild confidence
support lasting behavioural change
When the brain feels calmer and safer, healthy choices become easier—not because you're forcing yourself, but because your brain is working with you instead of against you. In recovery from eating disorders that result in malnourishment the priority is food and nourishment first before any other therapeutic intervention.
Recovery Is Possible
If you're concerned about someone dealing with emotional eating, chronic dieting, binge eating, body image issues, or if you're just tired of always thinking about food, it's never too late to transform a relationship with eating.
This doesn't need to mark the start of a conflict with your body.
Instead, it can be the start of a healthier, more compassionate relationship and recovery.
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